Veil Dance

Ghost Tarot by David Corsi

A fitting draw for this All Hallow's Eve...The Knight of Pentacles meditates upon the ship of the self being dashed against the shores of mortality, a very different Three of Wands than we traditionally see but relevant to the day's theme. In between tricking and treating, pumpkin carving and costuming, the cards offer a stolen moment, a quiet opportunity to contemplate the Soul's eternal now as it finds itself within the temporality of a body.

Stirring the Pot

Halloween Tarot ~ Halloween Oracle

As I was casting about for a deck to use with my daily draw I spied the happy pumpkins of The Halloween Tarot by Wes Kipling and felt drawn to their levity...apparently I was mistaken in my estimation of this deck. If this draw is any indication it pulls no punches. And to top it off the shadow card was the Eight of Swords. Sigh...and yet I journeyed with these cards, traveled into deserts I'd not anticipated and came away feeling renewed and lighter.

As I was looking at the cards came the line...loosen the ties that bind us. As with my draw earlier in the week I knew I'd heard the line before and as with the earlier draw it turned out to be a line from the Aramaic Lord's Prayer. I've worked with the Aramaic interpretation of this prayer off and on for almost two decades and while I'm intrigued as to why it's suddenly so determined to announce itself into my consciousness I'm not going to refuse its wisdom...

Cauldron ~ Synergy and Healing ~ Halloween Oracle

The sixth line of the KJV version talks of forgiveness, debts and the people we feel beholden to. Feeling one's lack, coming up short, blame and shame, and reciprocity's absence are all themes that we're invited to offer up into the cauldron of forgiveness such that we ourselves may be stirred and blended into the awareness that we are all one body. Neil Douglas-Klotz, author of Prayers of the Cosmos, describes it this way...

Loose the cords of mistakes binding us
as we release the strands we hold
of others' guilt.

Forgive our hidden past, the secret shames,
as we consistently forgive
what others hide.

Absorb our frustrated hopes and dreams,
as we embrace those of others
with emptiness.



This line of the prayer asks us to invoke a deeply embodied forgiveness. When sung and danced in Aramaic it is hauntingly beautiful, sober and yet invites a depth of connection with all beings as well as with the emptiness that allows us to experience each other's suffering.

Ten of Imps ~ Halloween Tarot

This figure in the Ten of Imps aka Wands looks like he is in need of this kind of compassionate embrace. The theme of forgiveness, of release continues....

Lighten our load of secret debts as
we consistently forgive
what others hide.

How often do I feel this way? How often are my loads self-imposed rather than external? These are questions to journey with when this card comes up for me. It's a mix as day-to-day duties naturally come with responsibilities that sometimes pile up but the loads that are heaviest to bear are those I place upon myself, those I keep to myself, those I close my heart around, a cross between this card and the Eight of Swords in many ways.

Untangle the knots within
so that we can mend our hearts'
simple ties to others.


The little stone heart pictured with the Ten of Imps is unakite. It derives its name from the Greek for 'growing together'. I reached for it intuitively on this day wanting its gentle beauty on my altar so I could see it often through the day. And how relevant it is to my draw as I look to the areas, the burdens that are asking for integration.

King of Bats ~ Halloween Tarot

And in comes The King of Bats traditionally the King of Swords...appearing in his role of arbiter, discriminating wisdom, Manjusri-like in his ability to discern wheat from chaff, the one who will guide us.

One of the words in the Aramaic version of the prayer is the word aykanna which translates to 'just as' in English...just as we forgive our debtors. It brings with it the quality of effort and intention, the desire for consistency and stability and reminds us that release is an ongoing practice, one that must be done regularly if our tangled relationships are to become whole and balanced again.

The King of Bats is a good role model for this kind of rigorous and stabilizing force to draw from. We need that kind of strength and confidence. We need his sword to untangle the inner knots.




The cauldron of God holds it all. She is the emptiness that gives shape to our longing for wholeness, for renewal and She is the very form of our suffering leading us back to Her. The happy little pumpkins, ghosts, bats and imps have taken me on travels I didn't anticipate. May each of us journey into the heart of our own unique and perfect longing.

The Dazzling Deep

Halloween Oracle ~ Raven's Prophecy Tarot

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us." Marianne Williamson

Graveyard ~ Unnecessary Fears

A perfect quote for this pairing of Graveyard ~ Unnecessary Fears and the Six of Wands with its themes of victory, success and accomplishment. And yet...something doesn't sit right with me about it. At first I thought it was because I intuitively sense that our darkness is as luminous as our light, our light as comingled with the pigment and texture of the manifest as our darkness. They are one sacred body.

But the Ravens wanted more of me than that. And conspiring with the Halloween oracle to take me into the cloud of unknowing...once again...they forced the question upon me, does the above quote hold true for me, does it have wings and heart within me...

does it feather my soul 
with the dark, rainbow 
sheen of Mystery? Does it 
breathe outside the sky 
it arose from?

Later on the ridge, the place where I most frequently see the ravens, I was walking along the top blown about by an incredible wind, watching my little pup's whiskers and fur being pulled backwards until she was all honed with a wild joy. And it suddenly came to me on one of those whirling gusts...

Six of Wands ~ Raven's Prophecy Tarot

It's a fine quote, a great quote but it's only half the story, a partial truth. What it leaves out is integral, what it omits is an awareness that exists beyond ideas of light and darkness, one that moves away from the comforting shore of duality and plunges into the horizonless fact of God. Now that reality is cause for a response so disorienting it might have me running back to grasp the shawl of light and coverlet of darkness like a small child, one who takes delight in the names and forms of her world.

Marianne's lovely words will have to suffice for now because I'm not ready for that kind of ineffability...yet. But know this...each of us has touched the ineffable at some point in our ragged, grace-filled lives whether we know it or not...

we've touched it 

because we're made of it. 
Awakening is cellular.

The Many-Petalled Darkness

Early pre-dawn...She walks between the worlds...the luminous darkness opens its petals...you don't need a path to find your way...day two of journeying with Hecate...

Creating Space for the Name to Live

Raven's Prophecy Tarot

This was another morning where the deck itself chose me rather than me consciously deciding to work with it. As such the reading took flight in a way that was stunning in its poetic accuracy as though intuition came winging its darkly feathered way into my heart, silently, abruptly, expansively. This deck, The Raven's Prophecy Tarot by Maggie Stiefvater, is a new acquisition and the first thing I set about doing when it arrived was to trim the edges. The original has orange borders which initially had me passing it by but I saw a trimmed version online and was smitten. The deck shines now, as though the raven medicine and wisdom was released with the trimming. The morning after I trimmed it my walk on the ridge was full of crows and ravens circling, gathering, cawing and grockling.

I drew these cards in the early morning and sat a while with them. The deck is non-traditional and yet the cards hold true to the RWS in a nuanced way. Looking at this spread for awhile and feeling into it my mind was at work. A little too much effort, came the inner voice. So I sat back and asked the Ravens what they wished to share with me in this spread. Immediately came the phrase, Creating space for the Name to live. It was direct, unequivocal and brilliant.

As I looked at the spread as a whole that phrase seemed stunningly on point. But where had I heard it? A little later while making breakfast I realized it was the Aramaic translation of the second line of the Lord's Prayer, Hallowed be thy name. The Aramaic is, Nethqadash shmakh...pronounced nit-kawdish shamook. I pulled out my copy of Prayers of the Cosmos by Neil Douglas-Klotz to explore more. Little did I know the Ravens would take me into the heart of one of Jesus's central teachings, a prayer that I find inaccessible in English but that comes alive for me in its original Aramaic. The cards led the way...

Ten of Swords ~ Raven's Prophecy Tarot

This is such a refined Ten of Swords and yet it gets straight to the heart of things. All has been stripped bare, nothing is left but the bones. Life as we identified with it is over, what's left is an imprint of what was. I often think of this card with the phrase, Die before death. Says Rumi in his opus, The Masnavi...

Remove the veils and tell the naked truth
Who sleeps in carnal embrace with their clothes?!

This card gives the feeling of an outbreath, a sense of spaciousness, of the essential. What do I need to pare down to move forwards? What will my next unadorned and rebirthed gesture be as I move into a new unknown?

The negative space around the bones lets their blunt, architectural truth shine. They underpin the soft animal of our bodies with their hard, resilient grace. Surrendering to this kind of stark refuge feels like a necessary step on the path with this card.

How to create this holy place within, what do I need to do? Some letting go is necessary for if the space is filled with clutter there's no place for an altar to unfold, let alone the eyes to see it. Silence, prayer, meditation, these are all forms of surrender, of letting go, of release. Neil Douglas-Klotz expands upon this second line of the prayer...

Help us let go, clear the space inside
of busy forgetfulness: so the
Name comes to live.

The Sufis have a practice called zikr which roughly translates as the remembrance of perfection and the perfection of remembrance. This card is getting at that in an utterly unadorned way, surrender not as an outward act or as something done, it's too late for that here in the Ten of Swords. It is Over. Instead it's pointing towards the recognition of an inner receptivity, the eros of soul and body refinding themselves conjoined in what at times might feel like a danse macabre but in reality is 'clearing us out for some new delight'. The Sufis have a practice...remembrance and perfection, lover and beloved.
 

Three of Wands ~ Raven's Prophecy Tarot

This Three of Wands continues the journey, invites the eye deep into the glowing embers in the foreground. A fire pit has been created outdoors with three branches surrounding it. Silhouetted against the Moon a raven perches on one of them, calling attention to her gifts, her magic, her mystery.

With the space cleared now there is an opportunity for the creative fire to live...for Thy kingdom come. In Aramaic this is Teytey malkuthak prounounced, teetay malkoo-tuk. I love what Neil has to say here about this line...

Create your reign of unity now--
through our fiery hearts 
and willing hands. 

Let your counsel rule our lives,
clearing our intention
for co-creation.



He talks about the roots of the Aramaic words, a language that is grounded in the body, the earth, the sound, with one syllable having multiple unfoldings. Teytey speaks to the holy space within being used as a workshop to envision and prepare for new creation. And here Malkuthakh is rooted in the image of a fruitful arm poised to create, that which says I can and is open to take a new direction. I like this image of a fruitful arm in relation to the skeletal hand in the preceding card. Rebirth is in the gesture.

Six of Cups ~ Raven's Prophecy Tarot

This sweet little raven looks longingly at the bubbles above him. His wings gleam in a subtle rainbow of light, his beak and eyes shine. This deck doesn't have ravens throughout it so when they do show up it feels like they're choosing to bless me with their presence.

This card is traditionally one of nostalgia, childhood memories, Storge as I like to think of it. Love is present in this card echoing key number six in the Majors, The Lovers. Again Neil's words ring out here, this time in the fourth line of the prayer...Thy will be done in earth, as it is in heaven. The Aramaic being, Nehwey tzevyanach aykanna d'bwashmaya aph b'arha. Here we go with the transliteration attempt...nech-way t-svyannach eye-kawna d-bawsh-maya awff b-arr-ha. The words are so beautiful when sung or spoken in Aramaic hence my attempts to share them. Neil describes this as...


Help us love beyond our ideals
and sprout acts of compassion
for all creatures.

As we find your love in ours
let heaven and nature form
a new creation.

Loving beyond our ideals is a profound meditation and one to drop deeply into.  The Ravens are asking a lot of me in this reading, taking me places I did not anticipate. But it feels so spot on in light of my preparations for the Thirty Days of Hecate journey I'm embarking on. My altar has been made over and my office tidied so I can offer myself more fully to this journey in which dying before death, paring down, discarding nostalgic or outworn views, and ultimately rebirth all feel like a key themes to embody with Hecate as guide and refuge, light and holy darkness.

Tales from the Emerald Fountain

Justice & The Devil ~ Bohemian Gothic Tarot

I drew the above heavy duty pair of cards several days ago. Both Majors they were unforgiving, cut me no slack and, sigh, were right on the mark, not to mention this is one of the creepier Devil depictions I've come across. The cards sat on my cotd altar and every time I passed them I could feel their harsh truth boring into my psyche with all the discomfort of cold, hard reality. I went about my day noticing how they reflected my actions in subtle and not so subtle ways. They followed me everywhere and I paid attention as best as I was able.

Quan Yin

But towards the end of the day I'd had enough lol and felt the need to seek refuge with another facet of Truth in the compassion-body of Kuan Yin. I felt like a child running towards her and flinging myself into her arms with relief. She responded unstintingly with a generosity that flowed over me in a healing fountain.

The Kuan Yin Oracle has been off and on my list for a while but recently I decided I needed some luminous energy to balance out all the shadow work decks and oracles I've been working with. Kuan Yin called out and I responded.

This deck by Alana Fairchild and artist Zeng Hao has its pros and cons. This is a far more sensual Kuan Yin than I'm used to interacting with but the luminous quality of the images and the strength of the meditations/visualizations outweighed the issues I have with the, at times, nubile presentation of Kuan Yin offered. And there is surely a place for the sensual mother in my inner-verse. We welcomed each other.

Before I set the cards out formally and worked intentionally with the deck I went about cleaning my Kuan Yin statue which was in need of some attention. This preliminary and very practical time with the Goddess felt like an earthy and fluid reacquainting. It's been a while, I thought, quite a long while if the dust was any indication. Eventually she felt sparkling enough, cleansed enough, purified enough...or was it the Kuan Yin within that felt that way? I was aware of my own inner compassionate and sensual mother as being much in need of polishing and attention, and the awareness that these two faces of the Divine are two rivers flowing towards the same Ocean.

Kuan Yin Oracle

I placed the deck beside Kuan Yin with one of my favorite lotus candles and some crystals and sat back to drink in the equanimity the altar offered. It felt so different to the Tarot cards that were sitting there previously and which still sat on the altar of my heart reminding me of the work I had to do. Yes, time enough for that but supported now by the heart of compassion.

How easy it is to drop into familiar patterns of pleasure and pain, loss and gain, fame and shame, praise and blame. I intuitvely feel the way through these is not by polarizing them but seeing them as different facets of a partial view, a limited perspective. Neither of them are particularly true or solid or static but it's very difficult to hold that kind of awareness in the moment that is flushed with emotion, with heat or ice, with anger or aversion.

Kuan Yin unfolded beautifully at the right moment to show me how this might be done skillfully, with grace, beauty and the kind of strength found in a surrender that yields.

Drink from the Emerald Fountain ~ Kuan Yin Oracle

This card was a jumper as I was formulating my intention...my cry. Entitled, Drink from the Emerald Fountain with its suggestions of thirst quenched, the verdant living earth and, of course, heart chakra energy, it felt like a balm on my soul.

Says the LWB, 'There is nothing to be gained from making life more difficult than it needs to be. When you allow yourself to be helped, great reserves of support become available to you. Your soul is strengthened and nourished by the loving heart of the Divine Mother. You are at a point on your path where you need support to rise up and break through. You are invited to drink from the Emerald Fountain, to accept the love pouring endlessly from the heart chakra of the Divine Mother as it would greatly benefit you even in ways that are not as yet part of your conscious awareness. May your spiritual thirst be sated and may you be supported and assisted by the Mother Divine.'

Silence. Pause. Breathing in. Breathing Out. Taking it in. Can I take it in? Pause. Silence...and more of the same for a while. We see her here in her four-armed manifestation, the male equivalent of which would be Chenrezig or Avalokiteshvara, a deity I have a long-standing relationship with. I often feel a resonance, a symbiosis occurring between Tara, Kuan Yin, Chenrezig, Jesus and Mother Mary as though they're all part of the same tribal body. And here that feels pronounced, as though all five of these bodhisattvas have converged in the river streaming towards me, or in this case in the Emerald Fountain flowing down the mountain of my awareness into the dry, parched, sere places that are in need of sacred waters. The ongoing question is not whether these Guides will respond to my call but whether I'm willing to allow the constancy of their message of love without conditions, without subject or object into the lotus-heart of my own awareness.

Before I go further I want to share something interesting that occurred with this process. I was cleaning Kuan Yin and sharing with my son the history of how this statue came into our lives. I mentioned that we used to be able to fill the flower stem at her shoulder with some water and it would drip down and form a droplet that would increase in size until eventually it released into the open dragon's mouth at her base and to repeat the process all over again. It's been many years since that worked and I assumed it wasn't functional anymore due to a build up of minerals from the water inside the tube that allowed the water to flow, despite many attempts to clean and fix it.

After I had drawn the card and arranged it on the altar to my liking my I suddenly noticed that a large droplet of water had formed...Astonishment...and the synchronicity with the water blessing of the card, the Emerald Fountain, was not lost on me. It felt as if some of those dammed up places within had been cleared simply by polishing off the Kuan Yin of my heart through my attention to cleansing her outer form. A kind of symbiotic, interdependent purification.

The LWB offers a Healing Meditation at the Emerald Fountain. Doesn't that sound lovely and restorative and nourishing? Images of misted bamboo groves full of lush greenery and ancient mossy rocks, silence, spaciousness and pure, mountain air came to mind and I offered myself to the loveliness of this inner atmosphere fully.

Kuan Yin Oracle ~ Drink from the Emerald Fountain

As I allowed the meditation to wash over me I felt the contraction of the earlier part of the day fall away. The quality of light, pronounced and supportive, was predominant as was the color green. I didn't feel the need to do much, to make something happen, rather I sat and took in what was offered. Simple, nourishing, restorative.

My Tarot cards were waiting for me upon my 'return' from the mountain. It's not like their teaching receded into nothingness, more that I could hold them, aka myself, in a more compassionate embrace, the light I shone on them softer and more forgiving.

I didn't come away with any answers, resolve or understanding but instead I came away with something that felt infinitely more valuable, the gift of presence, the experience of being with my shadow in a way that was spacious and replete with equanimity. As though Kuan Yin had her gentle palm on the small of my back supporting me, breathing me and reminding me that compassion, literally with passion, with engagement, with interest, is always the way through.

I shall tuck this experience away for the future to draw from when I need it. In the meantime I drew sustenance throughout the rest of the day from the simplicity of this brief retreat. Things unfolded with more peace, more acceptance, more light. The Shadow, of course, remains but with less stature, less defined edges, less identification. And as the day drew to a close and I shared with my husband some of my process I could feel the shift in my own perspective from one of contraction to one of expansion. Shadow energy was seen, heard then responded to with awareness, something I didn't think I was capable of at the beginning of the day. Much gratitude to Kuan Yin...

Like Our Tendrilled Life

Archeon Tarot

Using the lovely and evocative Archeon Tarot by Timothy Lantz this morning. I like this deck a lot. It reads very easily for me. A perfect message for a day spent at home with my family. Today's pair suggests opportunities for learning to choose my words carefully when communicating with my beloveds, as my son asks again and again for tea, toast, tylenol, hugs, blankets, hugs, hugs, hugs. We're all down with the cold so my husband is at home today, too--very much a Ten of Cups day for us though in a slightly different light.

Ten of Cups ~ Archeon Tarot

This is such a lovely Ten of Cups with its themes of tradition and beauty seen through a Japanese lens. The woman tends lovingly to the luminous cups in the foreground as if she knows the treasure they contain. She is conducting a tea ceremony and her focus and intention are clear.

The Japanese tea ceremony is an ancient and sacred ritual. I've been to a few and they are circumscribed by a rigorous formality that determines each movement, each breath even. One can't think of them without calling to mind Basho's poetry...

On a withered bough
a crow alone is perching;
autumn evening now.






Her head is illuminated by the Moon creating the kind of halo seen in Russian orthodox icons and giving her the qualities of a lunar goddess. A hawk flies across the moon paying his respects to the sacred scene below and calling forth all the qualities associated with his kind--vision, spiritual awareness and the invitation to focus on the task at hand. These are all good qualities to look at the lens of family through, to feel the thread that unites us, the present moment that contains all moments and the quiet joy that comes with the awareness of that connection. And on a purely practical level, half-way through the day seeing all those cups lined up for the ceremony and I realize that making cup after cup of tea is what this card is really getting at lol.

Herald of Swords ~ Archeon Tarot

This Herald of Swords, traditionally the Page of Swords, is so much more accessible to me because of the sensuality she exudes. Her whole body is involved, poised and ready for action, and I love this. Her nakedness an intimation that the mind can be sensual, can be voluptuous and full of eros and beauty as well as clear and to the point. So different from what we see traditionally and are led to believe, that words don't have a body, that thought and mind are separate from physicality.

Being a Herald she's endowed with feathery white wings that flare out behind her and when I feel into her body and what it might be like to wield a sword, naked and sprouting wings...well, dynamic is the word that comes to mind lol, a heady feeling of power, skill and focus and yes, sensuality. I resonate with this Herald and her announcements of the somatic presence and exploration possible in the landscape of the mind, of the breath.


Where do these two parts of me intersect, this sensual communication and devotion to family harmony? Reading these words of Basho's and I feel a peculiar confluence of the cards in his haiku...my breath-body as swinging bridge, my son and husband the beautiful tendrils of my heart...

Now the swinging bridge
Is quieted with creepers …
Like our tendrilled life.

How Blue and Tiny and Redeemable

 

Early morning with Tarot of Vampyres ~ Ian Daniels

I woke wondering whether I was up for another dark deck draw or whether I needed something lighter. I've been pulling from The Victorian Fairy Tarot at night and that has been a delightful counterpart to the shadow imagery of my darker decks. After some check in I decided I could handle something a bit darker but as I shuffled the cards I could feel my body tightening. Though I'm not actively following any of the shadow work challenges around the net I'm aware of my blog friends who are courageously traveling that path and I'm also aware of the encroaching darkness. The shadow body is in the atmosphere right now. Titration is so important in this work and I'm feeling where my limits are with this theme, feeling where I need to create some boundaries, where I can flow. I decided to go ahead with the Tarot of Vampyres as I felt in need of some journeying and this deck is good for that but I will admit that I breathed a sigh of relief when I pulled my card. That outbreath tells me something important about my inner current landscape. Breath is such a natural and accessible barometer.

My son is home sick today so seeing this Grail with its lovely green heart right in the middle of the cup and its circle of green roses feels just right. All that heart chakra energy is pulling me in, swirling me around, dancing me. A day for me to draw from the loving-cup within to nourish and support him. And to look to how I draw from the Source and how I am replenished...This excerpt from Mary Oliver's poem, One, sums up how it feels for me to interact with the Ace of Cups/Grails on this particular late October day...

Ace of Grails ~ Tarot of Vampyres

And then I think of that old idea: the singular
and the eternal.
One cup, in which everything is swirled
back to the color of the sea and the sky.
Imagine it!
A shining cup, surely!
In the moment in which there is no wind
over your shoulder,
you stare down into it,
and there you are,
your own darling face, your own eyes,
And then the wind, not thinking of you, just passes by,
touching the ant, the mosquito, the leaf,
and you know what else!
How blue is the sea, how blue is the sky,
how blue and tiny and redeemable everything is, even you, 
even your eyes, even your imagination.

On the Unsuspecting Tongue

~ Ceccoli Tarot ~

Today there was no question that this deck was the one I wanted to use. After I drew the cards I sat for awhile in the liminal candled light of dawn taking in the soft palette, the colors, the melancholy mystery, the sense of solitariness verging on isolation that these maiden feminine energies embody. I drew the Three of Wands and the Page of Cups and as the images and interpretations diverge from the RWS versions I let my intuition and interest wander through the story land of the cards.

Three of Wands ~ Ceccoli Tarot

This is one of my favorite images in the deck. The contrasts provide such texture...the stark, treeless branches combined with their directional, spark-like movement, the delicate flowers forming a graceful spiral around the solid tree trunk. The gossamer wings of the little faerie, the backdrop of cloud and beneath that the kingdom, her meditative pose and then there's the wonderful fox nosing about eating the flower offerings.

So much to take in here and so different from the traditional image of the fellow watching the ships in the harbor. And yet the LWB describes this as an assessing of losses and gains with the suggestion to realign with new information if necessary and an awareness of outside influences that may be thwarting the process. The key concepts are a pause in the endeavor, evaluating a situation. The faerie's hair is pulled back severely into a bun which suggests focus and a restraining of energies but I wonder if she sees the fox.

Clearly this vulpine creature is embodying the element of fire associated with the suit of Wands and yet done with subtlety, almost an afterthought, which pulls me right in. As such I'm drawn to his or her delicate and bold eating of the flowers, a flame consuming beauty's flame, and herein lies the symbiosis between the two figures, there is an alchemy occurring here, conscious or not, intention is passing between them. Mary Oliver names so perfectly this magick called fox, medicine for the wild soul.

Heart ~ The Alchemist Oracle

Tasting the Wild Grapes

The red beast
who lives in the side of these hills
won’t come out for anything you have:
money or music. Still, there are moments
heavy with light and good luck. Walk
quietly under these tangled vines
and pay attention, and one morning
something will explode underfoot
like a branch of fire; one afternoon
something will flow down the hill
in plain view, a muscled sleeve the color
of all October! And forgetting
everything you will leap to name it
as though for the first time, your lit blood
rushing not to a word but a sound
small-boned, thin-faced, in a hurry,
lively as the dark thorns of the wild grapes
on the unsuspecting tongue!
The fox! The fox!



Fox comes bearing gifts of invisibility, observation and adaptability. That my attention was drawn to this creature on the card suggests to me that some pathworking might in order with this totem animal. In the meantime I've gleaned some insight into the dynamic between this little Faerie-girl and her familiar. Theirs is one of oblique communication, creativity needing a flame so as to be received and transformed into something active, alive, wild. Waiting and watching unobtrusively for the right moment is key.

Page of Cups ~ Ceccoli Tarot

And that she is watching this lovely Page of Cups touches a chord. This apprentice of the emotions stands so surely and so innocently in the oceans of feeling that her own dress has become part of the element. Only her ankles and feet are immersed as she titrates what she can take in. The jumping koi suggest prosperity and energy, they are strong swimmers and as totem animals their blessings are powerful.

All these await this little Page as she learns how to dance with the element of water, the body of her emotions. The grey skies in the background feel like a reminder that all is not rosy, that weathering storms is part of the training.


I love that the little figure in the Three of Wands is looking towards this Page, almost as if for guidance. The Faerie-Girl perhaps has her sights set on the possibility of emotional maturity as long as she can wait and watch actively, creatively. This feels like an invitation to sit with the moments that feel tricky, that feel stolen, that feel like a blaze of confusion while at the same time being aware that small, incremental steps into the ocean of feelings are powerful. But mainly I'm soaking in the feeling of calm and ethereal beauty this lovely pair of cards offers me. During a season of shadows and encroaching darkness today feels like a day to revel in the muted pastels of girlhood--that magical realm where goldfish leap out of the sea, where roses make spirals around tree trunks, and foxes quietly flare and feast on beauty.

An Unbodied Joy

Halloween Oracle

I drew from the Halloween Oracle this morning with the intention of drawing only one card but I pulled two stuck together and went with this pair with its suggestion of holding light aloft in the darkness. The Buddha speaks directly to this in his farewell speech to his disciples wherein he encourages them to "Be a lamp unto yourself. Work out your own salvation with diligence..." There are many translations of this famous teaching but I like this one for its pith.

Skull of Darkness ~ Blindspots ~ Halloween Oracle

A perfect card for this time of the year and the little verse that accompanies it resonates...

We may not wish to delve there
The shadows, the darkness,
the unknown.
Yet when we search we reveal
And our power thus has grown.

This season with its themes of shadow work and liminal realms is reflected naturally here. Says the LWB, "The beautiful and mysterious skull of darkness encourages us to look to the parts of ourselves that normally remain hidden or as unseen as possible." I love the description of the skull, the sacred container for the work, as being beautiful and mysterious and that it encourages us rather than forces. There is much to be learned from this gentle approach with its intimations of secrets gleaned.

Blind spots are literally that, mind states we continue with because we cannot see the conditioning behind them. The pattern is the symptom, the red flag that tells us blind spots are arising. This is where friends and wise counsel are so helpful. And it's also where the soft animal of the body can act as our familiar, a subtle guide. Am I holding my breath, is my jaw clenched, what are my hands doing? How soft is my hara? And my feet, are they in communication with the sacred drum of the earth? All these are lights that point away from the sleep of ignorance towards the birth of self-awareness. Like the candle on the crown center of the skull I'm reminded that these brief moments of illuminated consciousness, no matter how fleeting, are sacred.

Nightsong ~ Hidden Talents ~ Halloween Oracle

Looking at this card I'm reminded of Emily Dickinson's line, "Hope is the thing with feathers." That ruby-throated song that takes wing and blooms in the ink-dark night. A perfect guide for times when the shadows within loom.

'Should this beautiful but shy bird sing to you by appearing during your divination, know that you must unwrap the present of yourself.' This tells us much about the journey. The song needs coaxing and encouraging through the dark corridors of constriction towards the luminous gift of the self which awaits our receiving, our unwrapping, unveiling...'like an unbodied joy whose race is just begun' says Shelley in his beautiful Ode to a Skylark.

This pair feel like gentle guides on a day when that is needed. The possibility that blind spots are brought to light on the lyrical wings of our listening.

Gazing on the Multiplicity of the One

Two of Wands ~ Niccoletta Ceccoli Tarot

A very early wake up, lots of time before my daily tasks began and yet I couldn't settle on a deck, Oracle or Tarot or both, dark or neutral, which one? Round and round I went. Finally I pulled a card from the Halloween Oracle, got a repeat of last week's fabulous Underworld card and as that felt like an ongoing theme decided I wanted something to address the more temporal issues of the day. I spied my Ceccoli deck sitting on the shelf and that felt just right. Dark, mysterious but with a soft and soothing color palette. And how fitting that I drew a Two, and the Wands no less, as my creative self wandered restlessly from deck to deck looking for inspiration's outlet.

Two of Wands ~ Ceccoli Tarot

I set the card out on my cotd altar and traveled with it through the morning watching the light change its atmosphere from sober and mysterious to magical and almost playful. The sense of being entangled with something just beyond reach, because it is a projection, speaks loudly here. What projections am I entwined with today? Where does my vision suffer from the myopic? Where do I need to enlarge my view? The circular border of the mirror suggests this as a kind of endless cycle both framing and circumscribing the expansive truth inherent in the reality of each arising moment. The key is to know when my view limits and when it acts contextually.

The card is interpreted as...'Illusion or enchantment may be keeping you from fulfilling your potential. Key concepts : Loss of will, coercion, pressure from others.' Today this speaks to me on a more internal level and hearkens back to a draw a few days ago highlighting similar themes on a more macro scale. Here, thankfully, they are titrated for me. The misty, grey backdrop, the element of enmeshment, the delicate, waif-like beauty of the girls all prompt different reactions from me. What enchantments am I weaving upon myself? Where do I need to 'flesh out' and earth my view? What part does individuation play in my day? What part of the forest do I need to journey to to come face to face with the ethereal spell-weaver?

No concrete answers revealed themselves and yet that felt just about right. The questions have been posed, seeded and will gradually find their way towards the light, little shoots of awareness stretching their small green bodies into the oxygenated atmosphere of consciousness. The imagery in this card is compelling, both drawing me in and excluding me at the same time. I've been thinking about it throughout my day, not so much what it might 'mean' but more tracking the way it has been intersecting with me emotionally. Noticing the times I've been lost in my own thoughts and constructs, the times I'm in dialogue with some idealized self just beyond reach, the times I'm under the spell of 'other', the times that yes-no energy announces itself. It's been an interesting journey.

Rubedo

Bohemian Gothic Tarot

I love this Queen of Wands and together with the Magician...well, hot stuff can occur if the smoke is any indication. When I look at this pair I think of the fourth and final stage in the Magnum Opus of the alchemical process, called Rubedo which literally means in latin, 'redness'. It signifies alchemical success and the end of the great work. This fabulous Queen is in the world but not of it, the fire around and in her so palpable the air fairly crackles. Even her black cat is keeping a distance. There is an element of isolation that I notice in this card that is perhaps the shadow side of 'in the world but not of it'. Something to be aware of, the tendency to watch rather than participate, to witness rather than immerse. A stance that has its merit though perhaps not for today due to her partner in this pairing.

With the Magician at her side we see the alchemical potential of passion, inspiration, creativity. And yet the temenos is only as dynamic as the will applied to it. Today as I journey with these two compelling figures questions arise for me of where to direct my creativity, my passion. What do I breathe in so as to shape the elements of my reality in a way that supports the trajectory of unfolding. For I am God's Magnum Opus, Her prayer and meditation, each breath a bead She touches and murmurs as my lungs expand and contract around the mirror She endlessly holds to my heart.

Seeding the New Moon

This past Monday's New Moon inspired me to use one of my favorite New Moon spreads created by Joanna Colbert Powell, author of the wonderful Gaian Tarot. And what better time to be initiated into one of my new decks than on the night of a virgin Moon. The deck I used was Tarot of the Sacred Feminine by Floreana Nativo with artwork by Franco Rivolli. I hemmed and hawed over this deck, drawn to it then not, feeling it too somber yet so mysterious, strong, dark, heavy...those are some of the qualities that cycled through as I researched it.

Tarot of the Sacred Feminine 

But it stuck with me circling round and back into my consciousness until one day on a whim I decided to purchase it. When it arrived and I unboxed it I was immediately and intimately drawn in. It is somber, non-traditional, made up mostly of women and has a depth to it that I can see how many would interpret as heavy but wow, what a lot of intensity and power it gives off. It has been poorly received in the Tarot community for a number of reasons, all of which are what I love about it. This is a deck to journey with. I experience it as Magritte meets Marion Zimmer Bradley meets Martha Graham. It has sat on my altar with a piece of carnelian on top of it for the last couple of weeks waiting for just the right time to use it. This New Moon in Libra suddenly called to me as the perfect moment for that and I'm so glad I responded to the call.

New Moon Spread by Joanna Colbert Powell

As I laid the cards out on the table, candles glowing, incense lit, guides and totems surrounding me I felt a quickening at seeing the images unfold. They are so non-traditional that they made little Tarot sense at first and yet that didn't matter, my mind wasn't speeding to grasp meanings, draw inferences or superimpose what I knew onto what I saw. I simply took in the gorgeous artwork and symbolism with a real feeling of curiosity and anticipation.

New Moon Spread with Tarot of the Sacred Feminine

I spent a lot of time just looking at each image to see what drew my eye in, where my attention wanted to focus, where my breath wanted to flow and where it wanted to ebb. Then I looked at the spread as a whole and a story began to emerge of descent and return, so perfect for this time of year. Finally I got out the LWB, typical of LoS, a few pithy sentences but in this case just enough to work with. After reading through the interpretations for the cards I put the LWB aside and again focused on the narrative the cards presented this time in relation to the positions of each card as they related to the directions and elements and then I let it sit and steep in the temenos of my dream-body for a few nights.

Three of Swords ~ Tarot of the Sacred Feminine

Position one focuses the question, How can I best seed the energy of this New Moon in the East? This direction focuses on communication, thought, information, intention, meditation and is associated with the element of air. I drew the Three of Swords. My intuitive response to this card was to see it as the initial stages of descent into the earth, into the roots of the Mother.

We see the nymph Daphne fleeing Apollo's love by transforming herself into a Bay tree. The pithy phrase in the LWB is, "Desperate, unrequited love that creates sacrifice." An oracle card drawn a day earlier,  The Underworld, elicited  from me the word, 'sacrifice' and here I see a woman embarking on a similar journey.

Apollo's love for Daphne was the result of an angry Eros shooting a golden love-inciting arrow into Apollo's heart and a leaden hate-inciting arrow into Daphne's heart. As a result Daphne spurned Apollo's love and when he was finally in a position to capture her she called upon the gods to transform her as a means of escape. She would rather sacrifice her human existence than spend it with Apollo. I love the imagery and symbolism in this card, all the green, the dappled light, the half-tree half-woman form of Daphne as she slowly descends into and merges with the earth's body. The sense of heartache and grief so typically depicted in this card is oblique and portrayed with all the complexity such feelings evoke. It is both a voluntary grief and not in the same breath. Leading the rest of the reading, this card with its placement in the East is whispering to me of my intention and of the potential small awakenings that might occur if I yield to the encroaching darkness as an ongoing meditation.

Eight of Swords ~ Tarot of Sacred Feminine

Position two focuses the question, How can I best seed the energy of this New Moon in the South? This direction is symbolic of passion, creativity, energy, and personal power and is associated with the element of fire. Here we see the descent enacted and embodied, literally as this card depicts Persephone herself as the prisoner of Hades. Only a dim light from above offers her some hope.

The colors in this card with its muted earth tones and sandy browns are broken only by the white of Persephone's dress, almost as if she herself is her own savioress. There is no sign of Demeter here yet, no sign of Helios, no sign of the above-world save that small shaft of light. Here we see her in the thick of her descent.

As this relates to areas of personal power, creativity, energy and so forth I feel here the sense of needing to put all of my creativity and energy and passion into the journey with Hecate that I'm going to be embarking on as the dark time of the year closes around us. It doesn't look like it will be easy but if Persephone's story is a guide it will be one of truth and authenticity and ultimately redemption, retrieval of what was lost.

Knave/Page of Wands ~ Tarot of Sacred Feminine

Position three focuses the question, How can I best seed the energy of this New Moon in the West? This direction is symbolic of emotions, intuition, dreams, sensuality and compassion and is associated with the element of Water. I drew the Page/Knave of Wands. Here, too, the theme of descent is carried forward with the winged figure of Ishtar. When I first looked at this card I felt I caught a glimpse of the first intimations of ascent in her rising form, her zodiac belt and the blue sky surrounding her. Later this was less clear but suffice it to say there is movement and agency in this card which is encouraging.

It's fascinating to me that she, too, appeared in this reading as her story is the Sumerian equivalent of Persephone's with its arc of descent and return. The waxing crescent moon hints at a germination that is occurring and the two owls, not one but two, are reminders to me to use my night vision and the quality of silence as guides. As well they foreshadow Athena's presence overseeing the journey in the card following this. The presence of the two lions inspire thoughts of the Strength card, of the support and exploration of the animal body, fierce and protective guides on the journey.

Ishtar is the goddess of love, war, fertility and sexuality. Though she is depicted here as a fire sign in the myth associated with her Ereshkigal, the Queen of the Underworld, was forced to revive Ishtar by releasing the waters of life which were sprinkled upon her thus restoring her and allowing her to return to the above-world. Her presence feels like a blessing on my dream body which will be a valuable guide on this journey, as well as the suggestion to rely deeply on my intuition, the vision that uses a different kind of navigation in the dark. The LWB's pithy but encouraging description reads, This is the card of vitality in actions and in the pysche.

Justice ~ Tarot of Sacred Feminine

Position four focuses the question, How can I best seed the energy of this New Moon in the North? This direction is symbolic of stability, security, health, finances, manifestation, the body and its elemental equivalent is Earth.

Here we have the Justice card embodied by Athena, Goddess of Wisdom, Courage, Inspiration, Justice, Strength, the Arts, Literature, Skill, Strategy and more. I love that, spatially, she is overseeing this spread. What solid energy to call upon. She falls in the position of earth and here the olive trees that flank her stand out for me as well as all the greenery behind her. The earth element is alive and thriving in this card. Says the LWB, Her severity is mitigated by the presence of the olive tree, the tree of peace, a gift from the goddess to mankind. Symmetry in the world and in the spirit. 

In terms of the descent theme of this spread I sense a tremendous feeling of support here in Athena, a sense of titration with those scales, that I will only take in what I'm able to release. Her totem is the owl, carried over from the previous card of Ishtar. I feel a particular affinity for owls and it is encouraging to see them here winging their way silently, mysteriously across in this spread, a wing-brush of magick on the throat of my awareness.

This is the only Major I drew and seeing it here, in the element I feel most challenged by, gives me a feeling of encouragement, that she'll act as a corrective presence, urging me unstintingly towards balance when that's called for. In fact apart from Athena this spread is made up entirely of air and fire. Athena's balancing presence in the position of Earth presses upon me the necessity of tending to the body in this journey, the manifest world of nourishment, sleep, fresh air. I sense she's encouraging me to make sure to "keep one foot on the ground."

Three of Wands ~ Tarot of Sacred Feminine

Position five focuses the question, How can I best seed the energy of this New Moon in the Center? In this position Joanna ascribes to it the quality of Spirit which I would associate elementally with Ether, the element that contains all the others. I drew the Three of Wands which depicts the pre-Islamic goddesses, Allat the incense burner, Al'Uzza the stork and Manat the thread of life. The LWB suggests these three goddesses represent our relationship with nature and says, Harmony in actions, the capacity to create alliances.

In many ways this feels like a whisper of Hecate's presence in her three-faced form Maiden, Mother, Crone. She's here overseeing the intention beneath this journey and as such, like its corresponding element Ether, contains all facets of the divine feminine.

Again the waxing moon appears in this card and seeing it carried over here from the third card suggests to me that my journey will not end with the next new moon but that I will be still germinating its seeds when that lunar energy arrives. The suggestion is of a longer journey than one lunar month and that's in keeping with my own feelings about this time of year. The theme of alliances here is a reminder to draw support from my women friends during this phase of the journey.

Another bird totem has appeared here in the figure of Stork. This lovely bird brings with it messages of creativity, rebirth, renewal and tremendous feminine energy. I take heart in its presence here in this position, the universe telling me that if I'm able to endure the tribulations in cards one and two there is the possibility of a new way of feeling, a new vitality and freedom.

My journey with these cards has been powerful and affirming. I feel encouraged by the depiction of a descent that is supported by various animal, elemental and feminine presences. Only in the living out of the journey will the actual story emerge but what has unfolded in this reading feels full of authenticity, power and beauty.

The theme of 'seeding' energy here used in Joanna's phrasing for each question echoes the pomegranate Persephone ate from while in the Underworld. I sense its presence here, its seeds and juices scattered throughout the reading leaving their bright, red stain of loss and integration across the cards. The waxing crescent moons mirror this maiden energy and place me, as querent, firmly within this archetype while at the same holding me in the wise and sober embrace of the Crone. This was a fantastic reading in so many ways and I came away feeling affirmed and heard by the Goddess Herself.

Lady de los Muertos

Lady de los Muertos ~ Halloween Oracle

I find it fascinating to see a female figure portraying Death. So often in the Tarot the majority of depictions are of a male figure clad in a long, body-covering cloak, his curves made by the shape of his bony frame, his look gaunt and empty. Here Death is feminine, sensual, beautiful and graceful. What an intimate feeling her energy offers us. She brings a visceral pulse to the passage that only a few breaths separates us from. The LWB talks of the Underworld as being the great equalizer which is seen in the keywords for this card of equality and acceptance. In the immediacy of the moment what might I let go of today?

It feels fairly obvious to me. I woke late to a house bustling with energy, activity and noise and right alongside a certain measure of resistance to that. My dh returned home late last night from a trip and as delighted as I am to see him and have him back it always takes some readjustment on my part from a quieter, slower more internal rhythm to one that is centered around others' pace and schedules. When I finally had a few moments to sit down with the cards this morning I could feel my scattered energy drawing inwards to rest in the sanctuary of silence that these few moments offered me. I wanted some guidance on how to wend my way through the day given the dramatic shift in atmosphere. I'm using the Halloween Oracle by Stacey Demarco and Jimmy Manton and as I was shuffling through the deck this card above was one I was thinking of. I had a jumper after this thought and sure enough, it was She gracing me with her presence and her beauty, the latter always a soothing balm and refuge to my soul. Lady de los Muertos, with her invitation of acceptance and release feels just right today.

Come the Rapture

Bohemian Gothic Tarot

The ideal versus the actual aka wanting it all aka timing is everything. What ghosts from the past are preventing me from embodying the Dance? What unfinished business wants completion? What shaky internal structures are in need of an integrating embrace today? These are the questions I'm journeying with on this mid-October Thursday.

Thirty Days of Hecate

Hecate ~ Universal Goddess Tarot

The daylight is dwindling down as the balance between light and night begins to weigh in favor of the darkness. I have come to experience this time of year as restrictive, emotionally dark and in recent years challenging. The weeks in this dark season lead up to two of the most important days in my life, the day I became a mother immediately followed by the day I lost my mother. From the portal of life to the portal of death in about 24 hrs. Thankfully my mom's passing occurred six years after my son was born so she was able to experience the anticipation and joy of his birth and the excitement of several of his birthdays.

Since her passing though it seems that something majorly impactful comes up either for me individually or for my family around this time of year. As the days shorten I feel myself moving through the weeks tense, anxious and wary. The contraction I feel is palpable as though I'm just trying to lay low and get through to the other side, Solstice. For me the New Year begins on that day, not on January 1st and not on Samhain but on the Winter Solstice when the dwindling light begins to widen, when that luminous portal opens itself up to us again.

Goddess Hecate

This year though I want to embody a different way of being with the darkness, to bring more awareness to it, engagement with it. As such I've signed up for Joanna Powell's Thirty Days of Hecate focus which begins on Oct. 26th. Through Joanna's offerings I'm hoping to open to this fear and anxiety a little within the sacred temenos of Hecate's guidance and wisdom and the womb of darkness itself. My aspiration is modest, to kindle the light of interest within this period of lengthening shadows and to do so actively and creatively. I'm curious to see how different I might feel being manifest and intentional rather than contracted and invisible, to see what fruit that kind of embodiment might yield.

"It’s about connecting more deeply with the rhythms of nature as you enter the fallow, dreaming time, follow the light of Hecate’s torches into the underworld, and honor your Beloved Dead."

I already feel a sense of anticipation and curiosity about this journey. Joanna's course won't take me all the way through to the Solstice but I'm hopeful it will seed roots in such a way that I'll be able to continue to hold that container, the dark womb, the chthonic ground. With Hecate as wisdom-guide and following my intuitive body where it needs to go I'm feeling led by something larger than myself. I have little sense of how it will be or look beyond my showing up as best I can through journaling, tarot and oracle work, drumming, painting, dancing, meditation and ritual. I'm planning some time at our local japanese-inspired women's spa on either end of the journey, a time to cleanse, soak, sweat and purify in the company of other women. I'm aware of a lot of my blog friends who are embarking on or in the midst of similar journeys and there is comfort in knowing that we are, each of us, finding our own way uniquely through Hecate's sacred darkness.

Hecate by Hrana Janto